Some text game.

My text game has gone through a baptism of fire the last three months. Time and time again I’ve lost good leads due to shit text game. Despondently I realised that street game doesn’t transfer (much) to the art of the SMS; it was time to hang up the 16oz gloves for a while and buy a gi.

Luckily for him I coincidentally am buddies with an analytical deconstructivist who happens to have spent the last few years amongst other things having hundreds of SMS interactions with girls, systematizing them and then writing them up into a shockingly deep new game book. Result. In other words the last few months I’ve regularly stared at my phone screen in confusion and asked Krauser what to do.

It’s taken a while, but finally, finally I feel I’m starting to get it. Text game is not easy. It’s an art. I knew I’d earned my blue belt when the other day I found myself sitting, chuckling writing a draft message to a new target and realised “this is not longer a chore… I’m enjoying this!”.

Let’s look at some of my old and shit messages.

This was probably my top wasted set of the last year. A hugely hot Greek girl that I got a massive IOI off at 9am Monday morning while walking in the rain to the train station. Go figure. I ran a tight four-minute walking set then easily extracted the number. The whole thing was amazing. It was mine to ruin. And I did. Let’s go over the game:


12:01 Me

Nice to meet you earlier… hope your shorts are drying out well.


[Decent ping. She seemed on, so didn’t wait too long. Callback humour to the fact it was raining and she was wearing weird little shorts.]


12:29 Her

Haha they’ve obviously left a good impression… wish me luck for hte meeting and have a lovely  day 🙂


[You can’t expect a better response than this. Super-quick reply indicates massive on-ness. She adds value by wishing me a nice day. This is mine to fuck up.]


13:38 Me

Good luck! remember to act tough… and most of all remember to get your shorts off the radiator and put them back on.


[First sentence is ok. Should have left it there. the second part is starting to be lame: I keep harping on with the same shorts joke. It subcommunicates a fear of moving on and striking new territory: which is needy, like I’m clinging to my chance. If I was doing this now I’d just send the first sentence and wait, pinging later and restacking.]


13:45 Her

Oh trust me they will know who’s wearing the trousers.. with or without shorts :p


[She still gives me a chance. This was in fact an Almost A Yes Girl (she was an 8 and 8’s are never full ‘yes’ girls. well rarely).  Notice she calls back to the shorts again. I misread this that she likes this banter, whereas now I read this as her doing what girls do: smoothing the cracks and keeping the peace in interactions]



Me 11:04

Oh no… I read it in Metro this morning: “Crazed Greek Girl Destroys Office in Meeting Meltdown!”


[Nowadays I’d not reopen so early. I’d have waited till afternoon. I have no sms game so I decided to use a variant on an old Jambone style message. What bothers me now as I read it is a) it’s try-hard b) I’m STILL harping on about the damn meeting.]


Her 11:25

Oh good… have they located my shorts yet? Haha


[She’s bored of this and saddened by my shit game. However it’s my job, not hers to restack, so she mentions those fucking shorts again just for something to say]


Me 12:14

They are in hiding apparently… but I know where they are. Don’t worry, I won’t tell. I’m thinking a quiet drink after work in Covent Garden, Friday….

[When I re-read this now it comes across as solicitous. There’s a slightly campy over-familiarity in the first and second sentences. Then I make the date offer when I have still not moved on and built any connection.]

She never replied.

What I needed before the date offer was one or two micro-connections. I describe a micro-connection as:

  1. I say something
  2. She acknoweldges it, likes it and shows it.

or even better:

  1. She says something
  2.  I acknowledge and stack
  3.  She likes it.

You can conceive of each one of these little sequences as a magic bean or a ‘point gained’ or something. In the dialogue above we had a micro-connection on the original shorts/meeting callback humour but there was really not a single stack in a new direction with a new micro-connection. I’d have needed a few of these before trying for the date. Too much, without enough foundation.

Krauser views the exchange and tells me it’s excrement. I’m disconsolate with fucking up such an amazing lead and can’t face trying to re-ping later. At that stage I couldn’t have done anything with it anyway. I do what all true daygamers should do: not beat myself up, move on and get more leads.

4 responses to “Some text game.”

  1. I can identify with this. I’ve been day gaming for a month and get numbers from approx 2 out of every 10 approaches I do. I’ve done 75 approaches so far. Solo.

    I’ve blundered some great leads because I didn’t have a direction. This post is VERY helpful in giving me a game plan, and makes good sense. – “…one or two micro-connections.”

  2. it seems to me if the connection isn’t there during the interaction not much can be built up to compensate using texting. why not just send her a feeler text and on any positive response [ie any polite reply] ask her out for a drink? the more faffing around with days passing by, the more you will fade from her memory as a guy on the street who spoke to her for all of 4 minutes in this case.

    looking at the whole description of what happened it sounds like one of the frequent types of flake that comes with the territory in daygame. its not so much your bad ‘game’ (text or otherwise), as a bad set up for a cold approach. you only spoke for 4 minutes, it sounds like there was some attraction there as she gave you an IOI and spoke for a few minutes and agreed to give you her no. However, how much would she have been able to learn about you in this time? Were you able to tell her anything about the sort of guy you are? I think she would have gone home, the attraction would have faded a little, she would then be on the fence and realised she doesn’t know you well enough for a meetup. You asked for a date and she cut her losses instead of taking a risk on you. I think you need at least 10 minutes, if not quite a bit more, 20 to 25 at least to bed the interaction down and build a reasonable bond. The problem in daygame is that a lot of girls are going to be in a rush meaning its impossible to get the time you need to build this connection with the girl. Yes, you can catch the aimless wandering girl from time to time, sometimes a girl will just give you the benefit of the doubt if she is in a rush and gives you her no. but this is the odd one here and there (who likely doesn’t have loads of other options). I think this lack of time is what drives the massive attrition rate in daygame, which is why as a strategy on its own it requires you to do so many approaches and dedicate yourself to it. Im starting to think its a useful add on, but only as a sideline to ecosystem and social circle game (which is how most ppl in the real world end up meeting partners). IMO ecosystem is the best of the lot, you do something you enjoy anyway, build connections and close when there is a opportunity. I guarantee the flake rate would be a fraction of what it is in daygame.

    1. I’d pretty much agree with everything you say.

  3. Holy fuck. I just commented on another of your posts whining about losing four leads. I just read this post and now I know why I lost them. Well, sucks to suck but at least now I know what I did wrong. And knowing is half the battle. Shout out to G.I. Joe.

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